The Science & Art of Writing

How To Rewire Your Brain & Banish Abusive Voices In Your Head!

9/6/2017

If you are an artist (or a human being) you have probably had to deal with internal self abuse. That negative voice in your head that says some pretty mean things. Things like...

You're just not smart enough.

People are going to laugh at you.

That's just not good enough.

That's so cliche.

They're going to think you're weird.

No one will ever like this.

Who do you think you are?

You're just not talented enough.

Any of these sound familiar? In no way, shape, or form will listening to these voices help you to be a great artist. So where do they come from and what the heck can we do about them?

These voices are not yours - they are someone else's words coming from a part of you that has good intention.

So sometime, long ago, probably in the first 8 years of your life, something like this happened...

Little Jenn (age 5) draws a picture of her family. She lifts the picture up and proudly shows it to her mother. Her mother begins to cry and runs out of the room, Little Jenn thinks "when I share my work, mom gets upset."

Now little Jenn doesn't understand that her Mom just had a huge fight with her boss and is scared she might lose her job and not be able to take care of her family. Little Jenn doesn't know that that is why Mom is upset. Little Jenn still attaches all effects to whatever happened immediately before it. Because little Jenn is five and has a lot to learn about the world.

Now if this was the only moment when something like this happened then Jenn might not develop an abusive voice but later on...

Young Jenn (12) plays a song she wrote in the school talent show. In the middle of the song she looks out at her best friend sitting in the audience. Her best friend looks totally pissed off. Young Jenn thinks "when I share my work, my friend gets upset."

Young Jenn isn't considering that maybe her best friend is jealous because she also auditioned for the talent show and didn't get in.

These experiences build and build on top of one another until they become the voice in our head. So now when a, supposedly, fully functional adult (lets just admit it - we don't really grow up we just get older) sits down to write her novel, when she imagines it getting published, it kinda makes sense that a voice would pop up and say "This is going to upset people."

Another example:

Little Ally practices a song to audition for the middle school chorus. Her mother, who desperately wants her daughter to succeed and get everything she wants blurts out, "Do it again, you're not good enough yet."

Young Ally gets an essay back from her 8th grade teacher (who knows how smart and capable Ally is). In the top right hand corner in big red ink is written, "D+ Ally, this just isn't good enough."

Adult Ally stares down at her screenplay, she reads over the scene she has just written, the voice pops up in her head "I'm just not good enough."

These annoying little voices have been programed into us since childhood but, most of the time, they are misinterpretations coming from people who had good intentions but flawed executions.

So the first step to us dealing with these voices is to get curious about our past and discover where they are actually coming from. Meditate and write down every single time you can recall an experience that helped build this voice. Often times if you find the very first one you can shift it and all the others will lose their power.

So go back as far as you can and write out this moment. Then you can reframe it. Help your younger self tell themselves a story that does not traumatize them. Jenn can have little Jenn realize that Mom had just gotten off the phone and her being upset was a result of that conversation, not the picture.

Ally can help young Ally to note that her mom's intention was to help her accomplish her dreams but that her Mom used some pretty bad languaging to do so, not because she was a bad mom (necessarily) but because she didn't know any better.

Going backwards is the first step - going forward is the second.

So now that you have an understanding of where these voices are coming from you can begin to change your behavior moving forward in order to create a new neural pathway that reroutes the negative self speak to positive self speak.

This is a very simple ACT!

A - Acknowledge the voice
C - Change the frequency
T - Two-for-one

Acknowledge The Voice

Recognize that this is a voice from your past. Acknowledge that it's intentions are good but it's execution is flawed. You can even speak to it "Hey voice, I know you are scared and want to make sure I don't get hurt but telling me I'm not smart enough to pull this off is doing far more harm than good. I have plenty of drafts to make sure this script is great, It's not going to be perfect the first attempt so please let me work."

The voice is a bit like a screaming child in the back seat of a car. If you ignore it, it's going to keep crying and if you yell at it, it's going to cry even louder. So acknowledge, but take away its power.

Change The Frequency

Taking the power away from the voice is easy. Pretend you have a frequency knob and then twist it up as high as it can go. So high that you only hear this voice as a ridiculous squawk, as if Betty Boop had just sucked on a helium balloon and was then trying to tell you "You're just not good enough." It will sound ridiculous and you will laugh. Because it is a ridiculous voice, and it's ridiculous for you to believe it. Helium addicted Betty Boop should NOT be taken seriously.

Two-For-One

Now the final and most awesome tool in this series is the Two-For-One. Since you heard a voice that said one negative thing about you, you have to replace it with two positive things about yourself that you truly believe in that moment. If you don't actually believe the positive thing, it won't work.

Years ago, I used to hear a voice, and even say outloud to myself "Because you're a terrible person Jess." What a useless thing to say to myself five times a day. But after a few weeks of acknowledging, changing the frequency, and then practicing two-for-one (usually starting with something shallow like, "I have great hair" because I felt silly doing this exercise, but then I'd feel the negative voice release and the self-loathing run away, allowing my second two-for-one to be much more meaningful, something like "I am extraordinarily compassionate towards my friends and strangers.") that negative voice just went away. I went from hearing it five, sometimes thirty times a day to hearing it maybe twice a year.

Self abuse will never help you, it will only hurt you.

If you continue to indulge in self abuse eventually your brain will get so sick of the abuse that it will start to tell you you don't like writing because it only brings you misery and then you will stop writing (or painting or singing or whatever). If you want to become a successful writer, (whatever that means to you) if you want to become a better writer, you have to ACTUALLY BE WRITING. So keep the dopamine flowing and get rid of the cortisol during your writing time so you can accomplish your dreams already.

Plus no one wants to work with a writer with low self-esteem. Ew. Part of being a professional artist is marketing, promotion, connection and community. You will succeed far greater if you have a healthy relationship with your inner artist.

The tortured artist is so last century. The mindful high-functioning artist is here to stay.

So be kind to yourself. The next time one of those nasty voices shows up remember to ACT and soon you will have rewired your brain to be a more mindful, higher functioning you.

Stay curious my creative monkeys,

Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

Truth vs Logic: Where Will You Find Your Story

7/8/2015

Logic is a wonderful tool that we humans sometimes choose to use, but Logic and Truth are two different things. When we confuse logic with truth....well...no bueno.

For example, I am a tall, lanky woman. Logic might lead you to think I do yoga and live a vegan lifestyle. Snooze. The truth is, I hate yoga and I eat meat almost every day, in fact, I grew up a bow hunter. Growing up, I rarely did anything "girly" like yoga because my stepfather wanted a son.

Logic often leads you to stereotype and cliche. Seeking out the truth leads to novelty and, most important, story.

I will write more about this in the fall but right now I just want you to practice differentiating between using logic (to build one possible option) vs seeking out truth (to discover the story.)

Remember, we are not logical or rational beings automatically. Logic and reason are tools we are capable of using but our nature is rooted in the emotional. So if you are writing a screenplay, focusing on the logic or the reason of the plot and the character will not lead you to the Truth the way that following the emotional journey will.

Stay tuned for more on the neuroscience behind human (and therefore character) behavior and how it can help you in your life and your characters in their story.

tak,
Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

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The Super Amazing Secret To Eliminating Distractions While Writing

6/26/2015

Do you often find yourself easily distracted?

If you are a writer the answer is YES! Don't worry my lovelies -- there is a way to make sure you are never distracted again. No, not snake-oil. You will have to practice this technique but after a few times of doing so...you will laugh at how silly you were before.

Visualize yourself in your favorite movie theater. You look up and watch as an amazing film plays on the massive screen. Then it happens...some asshole in the row ahead of you stands up and begins to scoot to the isle. This big moving silhouette blocks your view, grrrrr!

The world is split into two kinds of people. The first kind will start yelling "Hey you, down in front!" Huff, puff. "You are ruining the film!"

The other kind of person just stays focused on the movie screen and pays no attention to that silhouette. A silhouette can pass on by and you can still watch and enjoy that film.

That's it.

Distractions are only distractions if you CHOOSE to pay attention to them.

If you try to fight them you give power to them and you are choosing to be distracted. But if you treat them like the silly silhouettes and shadows that they are and stay focused on the film....meh, no problem.

A small shift in mindset creates massive results.

Too many artists waste time and energy fighting silhouettes. Let them be there, pay no heed, just do your damn job and let the fools fall to the side.

When you are writing just keep your eyes on your character. Watch them like a hawk. Watch them and follow them as if they were a kidnapper who has your baby and is running away.

If you were chasing a kidnapper who has stolen your baby you would NOT stop to say hello to an old friend, or go do the dishes! No! You would chase after them with such focus you would give no fucks about anything else.

The other great thing about letting your characters lead you when you write is you don't have to make a bunch of decisions. You only have to make one -- follow that character. Write down everything they do as they race after their goal.

So stop CHOOSING to pay attention to the silhouettes and start following your character.

vielen Dank,

Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

This article was written while while flying to Berlin. Remember, there are 24 usable hours in a day.

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Why Being Selfish Is Good For You (and everyone else)

6/13/2015

Just remember - doing only what you want when you want and being an asshole are two different things.

How often do you feel the painful drag of obligation? If you are anything like me five years ago -- Too Fucking Often.

Do you find yourself feeling resentful of people you love when doing kind things for or with them?

Do have the unending need for freedom screaming from your bones?

Do often beat yourself up for feeling selfish because, even when you do put others first you feel you would rather be somewhere-anywhere else?

Guess what -- you need to get selfish.

That's right. You need to throw everything down and commit to only doing what you want to do when you want to do it - fuck everyone else.

Five years ago, filled with anxiety, depression, self loathing I decided to do this, and you know what I discovered? The moment I decided I would only do things I wanted to do...I started doing a lot of awesome new stuff. But more importantly I did a lot of the same stuff. Only this time I didn't have that drag of obligation, there was no resentment. Most importantly I realized I really actually am a very selfless person by nature...when I allow myself to be selfish.

In fact the first thing I did was start teaching for free and outline a scholarship for artists from my hometown.

That's how I got rid of that nagging "you're so selfish" voice that would ruminate round my head fifty times a day.

Most people are not selfish, we become that way (and miserable and cold) when our reasons for doing things come from obligation rather than true desire.

So go forth - Be Selfish - only do what you want -- and see who you really are.

NOTE: If you are a psychopath, please disregard this blog post. Please do contact me as I would like to ask you many questions. No judgment - just curiosity.

NOTE NOTE: If you do this and discover you truly are a selfish dick....good. At least now you know and if you want to you can do something about it.

Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

Change One Word - Change Your Life

6/5/2015

You don't HAVE to do anything. You CHOOSE to do things. You choose to get out of bed. You choose to not work out. You choose to go to work. Stop saying you "have to" do these things.

Stop lying.

Granted you may not like what happens if you chose not to go to work. But it is still a choice.

Why the hell does this one little word matter?

A lot of crap comes with the words "I have to". It makes you feel as if you have no control. Yuck. It reminds you of when you were a child and you were told where to go and what to do all day long. Saying "I have to" is confirming for yourself that you have a life that is not what you want it to be, it breeds discontent.

So stop lying and making yourself feel like shit.

Replace "I have to" with "I choose to".

It's the truth. Even if a thief has a gun to your head you have the choice to hand over your wallet or not to. Aside from your body's automatic systems you choose everything you do.

Say the following two sentences out loud; "I have to go write." then "I choose to go write." -- Feel the difference?

"I choose" makes us feel in control. It reminds us that we do indeed have a choice. It also allows us to feel proud that we are making the right choices.

When you say "I choose to go to work today" you feel good knowing that you are being a responsible adult and a reliable co-worker and a dependable employee or boss.

Wouldn't you rather feel powerful, proud and in control rather than immature, disgruntled and out of control?

Try it for a week. Every time you catch yourself saying "I have to..." (either out loud or in your head) - stop - and replace it with "I choose to" and watch how one little word changes your story, your emotions, your energy, your choices, your life.

Namaste Bitches,
Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

Your Ego Is An Idiot With A Label-Maker

5/29/2015

Know yourself - don't define yourself.

Labeling is the addiction of your Ego. Defining is like drawing a circle around yourself and saying I can not go further.

We are constantly changing. Our blood, our brains, our memories, our experiences. Every moment we are a new self. Every day we aren't who we were but who we are, and by the end of this sentence you will be a different you.

Remember the moment, the phrase, the re-frame that you heard and instantly you were different and seeing the world through new eyes...

Defining yourself puts imaginary limits on real possibilities.

Instead, commit to knowing yourself. Knowing yourself is investigatory, it requires curiosity. Since we are changing every day - we must do this every day to be able to say I know myself.

Defining is the ego saying I am a writer. I am a woman. I am young.

Then you don't get the writing fellowship. You develop cancer and your lady bits get removed. You turn 40. (I personally have only had the first one happen to me.) You suffer, you are traumatized and then you make big life choices when you are depressed, detached, and fearful.

No bueno.

The ego is what produces anxiety and fear. Fear of reality conflicting with your ego labels. You are a Writer so you have anxiety about writing because if you don't you are not a writer.

If you do not label yourself a painter you will not have fear about painting because fuck it, you're not a painter, nothing is at stake, go ahead throw some paint on the canvas.

That's when you produce your best work.

If you want to create great art you must know yourself because all your characters/ painting/poems are fractured parts of your identity, your identity that is in constant development, and it is yourself you are putting on the page or canvas. The deepest universal truths of you, the dark shadows of societal repressions that perhaps only you are brave enough to throw up onto a screen so that others might look up and think I'm not the only one.

So stop limiting yourself.

Screw your ego and it's label maker.

If I wake and I sing, I sang. If I wake up and dance, I danced. If I paint, I paint. Then when someone asks are you an artist I can answer...this morning I sang, danced and painted. Let them label you if their ego needs to. But don't let other peoples label makers guide your actions.

Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

ABL: Always Be Learning

5/22/2015

Waiting is what boring people do while smart people are learning.

That's right folks there are 24 useable hours in a day. Here are 4 "dead zones" where I find time to do some of my best writing, research and continuing education.

1. Morning Routine

From the moment you open your eyes till the moment you leave your home for work (or play) you have minutes, possibly hours of free time.

Your morning routine is automatic. Get up. Pee. Brush teeth. Shower. Make toast. Pour coffee. Put on pants. Take off pants, put on underwear, put pants back on. Do hair. Put on Sunscreen (you should be wearing sunscreen, skin cancer sucks) Phone/Wallet/Keys. Exit.

These actions are unconscious habits, meaning you can actually pay attention to something else that does require your cognitive focus and get BOTH done. For example, I listen to my German For Beginners audio while I shower. You wouldn't think just 8 minutes a day of German is a lot but it has added up, es ist fantastisch!

Podcasts are a great way to not only expand your mind and knowledge during your morning routine but anytime you clean your home, do your laundry, organize your closet etc.

My personal favorites are The Psychology Podcast, The Tim Ferris Show, Wake Up with Sam Harris, Write Your Screenplay, and The Brain Science Podcast.

2. Commute

I LOVE my commute. I love it when the train gets stuck, because that means I get to listen to more of my audio book. I used to hate audio books because my mind so easily wandered but I stuck with it and have since fallen in love. I usually choose one educational text, perhaps from The Great Courses and one novel that I consider research for whatever script I am working on.

So if you are writing a story that takes place in the in early 1800's England, put on some Jane Austen and suddenly your dialogue and tone will naturally morph into awesomeness.

3. Sleep

That's right, always be learning, even when you are catching some z's. If you spend the last five minutes before you fall asleep and the first five minutes you wake up journaling (about your story, character, teleportation device construction, ways to silence your mother-in-law, deconstructing those inner voices that cycle around and around in the back of your head all day) you will accomplish a lot of problem solving while you sleep.

Also, you will most likely see this information in images or metaphors (rather than thoughts) which is the most powerful and memorable way to learn (that's a whole other essay so stay tuned, I'll be writing about that later this summer).

4. Wake

This one is my favorite. Many of my writers complain, "But Jess, I don't have enough time to sit down and write." and you know what - they are right. Many of them can hardly find three hours a week between their two jobs, two dogs and Instagram addiction. But you don't need to be writing to be working on your story.

Your characters are always with you...helloooooo, they live in your head! So every moment of the day you can see and hear your characters. Next time you are at a boring meeting invite your character John who lives alone in the woods and hates everyone. Watch him react to this months sales decline, not only will you get to know John better but you also are less likely to fall asleep mid meeting and loose your job.

Yes, occasionally you will laugh out loud and people will think you are crazy....but you are a writer, if there are people out there who don't already think you are crazy then it's only a matter of time before they find out the truth.

So ABL! Always Be Learning.

The next time you groan and think "ugh I hate waiting" replace that sentence with "Woo hoo, now I get listen to my podcast on cross-stitching with my character Hannibal Lecter jr."

Jess Hinds
The Crass Shaman

Replace Judgment With Curiosity

5/15/2015

Increase Creativity While Decreasing Douchiness!

This week's inspiration is one of my favorite principles for increasing creativity. It also keeps you from being an asshole.

Always replace judgment with curiosity.

Judgment is walking into a room with no doors or windows...there is no where to go. Curiosity is an endless hallway of open doors.

The next time you catch yourself judging (a friend, a stranger, your own writing) stop. Replace that judgment with curiosity and see what happens. Do this consistently for a few weeks and it will start to become an automatic, unconscious action.

Our world's greatest artists, inventors and geniuses all have one thing in common. They all have been very curious people.

Start today. Right now. Replace Judgment with Curiosity.

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